Show Your Strength, Be The Light, and Respond In Faith!

And I'm BACK! Already with something new to talk about! Woohoo! The exciting life of Mallory returns. Actually this is something I have wanted to post since Oct 12th, the day I was able to go through the temple, but I just haven't found the right words to express it.......
UNTIL NOW!
PS..... I so I totally just read through this.... and its a little scatter brained.... ha ha ha. So I jump around a lot about different things..... so I apologize in advance!

This was the day I received my endowment! 

Oct 12th 2017

Yesterday I had a conversation with one of my coworkers, and she mentioned to me that she really appreciated how open and honest I was on my blog, and how "strong" she thought I was. She mentioned this a few time during the conversation actually......"you are so incredibly strong". And she is not the only one to mention this to me. "Wow Mal, you are so strong!"

Strong? I honestly don't think of my self as a "strong" person. Well..... at least not physically..... in ANY WAY.... (although I do plan on starting Cross Fit Helo in West Jordan starting next week! woohoo!) Mentally strong? HA! I literally started this blog because of my drug induced psychosis.... which is still effecting me even though I've been clean for almost year now..... 353 days to be exact. It wasn't until the end of the conversation I had with my friend that I realized what kind of strength I had.

After she had mentioned how strong I was for like the 3rd time, I totally interrupted her and blurted out "if it wasn't for the gospel, I would never have made through this year".

Then I had a total *DUH* moment in my head.
I AM SPIRITUALLY STRONG!!!!!!

Over the past year, I have been through a lot. Not just in my sobriety, but mentally, physically, and most of all spiritually.( A very huge example of this was explained in a video I made and posted *super emotional and really embarrassing* 2 posts ago about all the temptations I was having right before going through the temple). All of these trials or temptations I've had this last past year have made me a stronger person. But let me tell you this...... I would have never been able to overcome or move past these things if I was not spiritually strong.

Now I cant quote scripture very well, and I certainly could NEVER teach a gospel doctrine class, I would probably even struggle through a primary lesson.... lol. That's not what I mean by being spiritually strong.....and its hard for me to explain how I see myself as being spiritually strong.... so I will give you an example that happened to me recently......

During my treatment at Valley, we are given assignments to work on that help express our feeling and issues into why we started using drugs in the first place. On multiple assignments there's always a question saying something like "if (blank) happens, this could cause me to relapse". Well I would always say the same thing in every assignment. Mostly because if this "thing" were to ever happen, I could totally see my self relapsing. I would love to say I wouldn't relapse..... but for some reason, this "thing", I thought, would cause me to.

Well towards the end of October...... this "thing" happened. The one "thing" I said that if it were to EVER happen, I would probably relapse.

After I found out about this "thing" happening..... guess what my first thought was? I really want to pray right now (in my head I knew that I could turn to my savior and he would help me with this pain and grief)...... WHAT??????? Crazy right..... here it had been almost a year of thinking that if this "thing" happened I would just automatically want to go use. But no..... that's not what I thought of. My first instinct was to pray. After I did that..... whatever thoughts or ideas I had about relapsing would leave my head as soon as they entered it. It was seriously a miracle.

It wasn't my own personal strength/will power that got me through this. I've already explained to you that mentally....I'm not all there.... and physically..... well..... I'm a little TOO much there, if you get what I mean (ha ha ha .... made my self laugh pretty good on that one) (that's why I'm starting Cross Fit Helo)

It was my spiritual strength that got me through this. It was knowing that my savior has experienced this same exact feelings, and knows how to help me get through them.
I can honestly say that if I were not for the Gospel, I would have relapsed. Because of this gospel I have been made strong. I have overcame things I could NEVER see myself overcoming. Because of this gospel, and the atonement of Jesus Christ, I know with out a doubt in my mind that I can overcome my trials and temptations. I literally am living proof of it.

*Side Note*
So this summer, I was helping at some summer camps, and some of the little kids asked me "Miss Mallory, are you LDS?"
(Now looking at me, that's not really the first thing people think about me.... because of my tattoos and gauges....at least that's what I thought)
I responded "Yes, I am, How did you know?"
I will never forget what they said to me....... "we can just tell, there's a light about you"
SPIRITUALLY STRONG PEOPLE...... I was LITERALLY GLOWING in the spirit that day! lol
Totally random I know... but this just popped into my head while I was writing this post, and I had to share it because I was Spiritually Strong then, I just didn't know it or realize it until now.
*end of side note*

Also, the Lord has a plan for us. He is very organized. This "thing" that happened recently in my life, could have happened ANY TIME this past year.... but no..... it happened AFTER I went through the Temple, it happened AFTER I gained a strong testimony. It happened when I realized how STRONG I really was.....

“The Lord has given us agency, the right and the responsibility to decide. He tests us by allowing us to be challenged. He assures us that He will not suffer us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand. But we must understand that great challenges make great men. We don’t seek tribulation, but if we respond in faith, the Lord strengthens us.” -Dennis E. Simmons 2004 General Conference

If we respond in Faith, the Lord strengthens us. Oh I love that.....I'm going to type it again....

If we respond in FAITH, the Lord STRENGTHENS us! (made it a little bigger so you can understand how important it is..... lol)
That's what I did.... when I had a problem the first instinct was to turn to my Heavenly Father and my Savior, and it strengthened me.

Spiritually Strong to me means having your full trust in the lord, having faith that no matter what happens, he will be there to help you. I believe you are as strong as your Faith..... so if you are feeling weak.... or not as strong as you think you should be.... turn to our Heavenly Father and talk to him.... he is ALWAYS there to help, but you need to have the faith that he WILL help.

So I know this post has gotten a little long..... but I do want to end with a suggestion..... or we can call it a challenge.

Light The World: 25 Days of Service starts December 1st. One of the best ways (in my opinion) to be Spiritually Strong is to serve. When we serve others we are following the example of Jesus Christ and doing as he did. I challenge you to take part in this 25 days of service. You would be so surprised how much good a simple act of service can do. How much strength you can gain from helping and serving others. Show your strength, be the light, and always respond in faith!